Tuesday, 20 March 2012

and you caught my eye...

Today sucked! their is no other way to describe it! It's been like nearly two weeks but if anything i miss you so much more! When i catch a glimpse of you it makes me happy, but then again it makes me feel very empty. All i want to do is hug you, cuddle with you and talk to you! you were my best friend for such a long time, now its just empty. I can't escape you, when i can't see you i'm thinking about you. Everything i do reminds me of you, just going out to walk the dog reminds me of you. I can't escape you, sometimes i wish i could for just a day, but i can't. I just want to be with you, but why? why do i want to be with you? you broke my heart so many times, yet i still feel the same about you! I've never missed an Ex like i have missed you! I miss your laugh, your smile, i miss how you would say things one minute and a day later forget you said them! I miss your kiss, and the way you used to lick my nose! I miss how you used to listen to everything i said, and even if you were not listening you made it seem like you were! I miss you calling me "Sweetpea"! I miss how you would correct my grammar at every moment possible! I miss how your insults don't make sense! I even miss watching Jeremy Kyle with you! I miss how you only ate cheese sandwiches and drank only water! I EVEN MISS HOW EVERY MEAL WAS PIZZA! I miss making cakes, muffins and cookies! I miss watching you, in all your beauty! Whether it's sewing, knitting or just reading a book. the way you used to shout at me for not doing work, and shout at me for distracting you from your work! I miss how you used to beg me not to tickle you, but i still would! I miss the intense stare you used to give me before we made out. I miss laying in your bed next to you, just cuddling and talking. I miss your cute little snore you had when you fell asleep in my arms! I miss the random German conversations we would have. I miss how you would ask my opinion on something then completely ignore it. I miss how everything was hand made, made with love and care! There is nothing i don't miss about you! You mean so much too me that i can't just let you go! What can i do to make you love me? I want all these things again! Actually i don't.... i just want you!

Rachel Latham, i love you